It's all coming to an end....

We went and visited with the lady that will be watching on Kayden on Monday's and Wednesday's when I go back to work. We are so fortunate to have a Christian lady with a little girl a couple months younger than Kayden that has agreed to watch him those 2 days. She is wonderful and such a sweetheart and I know he will do great there. However, this visit just solidified the fact that, in 16 short days I will no longer be a stay at home mom and will switch my role as primary care taker of kayden, to "secondary". I know I will always be the primary care taker per say.. but he is now going to be with people who will see him for a longer wake time than I will. I know people do it every day and their kids turn out just fine. It's just getting harder and harder on me to believe that I will no longer be home with him all the time and I will have to depend on someone else to feed, change, comfort, and play with my baby. I know everyone who will be watching him will do all of these things just as well, if not better, than what I can do.. but he's my baby and I'm having a really hard time letting go of that. I just keep telling myself that people go back to work after only 6 weeks of staying home with their baby and they are just fine. I KNOW he will be just fine, I'm just not quite ready for all of this to come to an end. Thankfully, this lady will watch him Monday and wednesdays, Nick will be home with him on Tuesdays or Thursdays (he will stay home one of those days, and we aren't sure where Kayden will go the other day) and my mom will keep him on Fridays. He WILL be ok. I WILL be ok. That's the mantra i'm just going to have to keep telling myself. I just don't know if telling myself that will work come August 11th.